Hi, Gene!

Ok, I am getting TONS of reports of one particular office habit. Instead of publishing every single one (especially since most are simple one liners), I am just going to make a general statement: APPARENTLY MEN DO NOT WASH THEIR HANDS AFTER USING THE RESTROOM. It seems to happen in all sorts of careers, from bankers to landscapers, to - most disturbingly - doctors and kitchen workers. *Shudder*

I once read the statistics on the male to female ration of handwashers, and I remember it was startling - something like 80% of females washed their hands after using the bathroom, but only 20% of men did (I'm too lazy to go look up the actual numbers, sorry). And when you think about it, women aren't even really touching anything other than toilet paper, yet they wash, while men (how shall I put this?) need to get a good 'grasp' on the situation. Makes you wanna shake some guy's hand, eh?

So for the good of all mankind (and womankind), let this be a sort of public service announcement (I admit to having the desire to leave out the b in public, but even I wouldn't go that far. Maybe.). Here it goes:

MEN, WASH YOUR HANDS! WE ARE ON TO YOU! IT'S DISGUSTING! SO THERE!

That is all.

Thanks to all for the submissions about lack of bathroom hygiene.