You're So Vain, I Bet You Think This Post Is About You...

I worked with a woman who was so vain it was insane.  (Poetry! Yay!)  She had a large standing mirror at her desk and would watch herself in it as she did her work.  She also touched up her makeup continuously, which would take her a good fifteen minutes for a single retouch session.  And trust me, she must have had to scrape off the stuff with a trowel at night, it was inches thick.  The other women  in the office were always amused when she would offer them makeovers and give unsolicted tips such as "Contouring would really bring out your cheekbones, honey".  Her form of contouring was  painting a brown stripe under each cheek.

One day she brought in all these Glamour Shot portraits she had taken at the mall and hung them all over her cubicle walls.  She referred to them as 'her portfolio'. 

Now I can't stop Carly Simon from singing in my head.  I really hate earworms.

"You're so vain..."

Thanks for making me crazy with this stupid song, MarvinPlata!