Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Driving Miss Tipsy

I am a driver for a limo company, and this isn't about the Crazy People I've Worked With, but rather, worked For.

People do some damn disgusting things in limos.  Whoever in hell decided sex in a limo is a sexy thing?!?!? It's far from a novel idea -you wouldn't believe how many people do it.  And trust me, we do not disinfect or even wipe down the seats.  So there's a good chance you're sitting in someone else's (words edited out, but I think you all got the idea).

There is actually one time we do have to do an intense cleaning - and that's after a vomiter.  There is a lot of those, too.  It's great that people are being responsible while drinking and hiring a driver, but really, should that driver have to be responsible for the fact that you drank your face off and are now spewing uncontrollably? Some people make small attempts to swipe at stuff with a tissue, but in the end it all comes down to us.

And I am not your slave nor servant, so stop speaking to me like I am.  I am just there to do a job, like the rest of the world.
Next time I am in any sort of car that is not my own, I will be wearing a full body condom.  So if you see me, give a wave!  I will be the one encased in Latex.

I think I might detect some anger here JoeyAveloni...


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