Stayin' Alive

Yay, we have another from HRLady:

Another interviewee I had was a bit…..off. Her resume was great, but her actual interview, welllllll…..

Me: Tell me about your previous employment.

Crazy Job Applicant: It’s on my resume.

Me: I know it is, but I want you to elaborate a bit.

CJA: I don’t talk about my past.


Me: No?

CJA: No.

Me: Okay then, what was your base salary at your last position?

CJA: That’s my past. I don’t talk about it.

Me: Great. Moving on….what are your goals within this company if you should get the position?

CJA: Am I supposed to predict the future? Because I have just one goal at this point - staying alive.

Me: Thank you. We will be in touch.

So you hired her, no? You’d be stupid to let that one get away!!

Who has the Bee Gees stuck in their head now? *raises hand*

Feeling Cocky

I work in Human Resources, so basically I interview a whole lot of people. A few have certainly stuck out in my mind, for example, one kid straight out of college. The conversation went like this:



(Kid walks in looking super relaxed)


Cocky Job Applicant: So, let’s get right down to it. There is no one better for this job than me. You’d be stupid (!!!) to look further.


Me: We have many qualified applicants.


CJA: Of course, you have to say that. Can we talk money?


Me: There is much more to cover before we discuss salary. You don’t have much job experience.


CJA: I don’t need experience. I have more brains and talent than most of the people already working here.


Me: (Starting to get reeeealllly annoyed.) Well, that’s nice, but I can’t really take your word for it.


CJA: When I work here you’ll see what I mean.


Me: No, I won’t. Because you won’t be working here. And I suggest you refine your interview skills before your next interview.


CJA: (Looks shocked, then recovers his swagger.) Dumb move, lady. Someday you’ll see my name and regret not hiring me.


Nice, huh?

Admit it, you all thought from the title I was going somewhere else with "cocky".  Heh.

She probably will see his name somewhere at some point. Quite possibly the Police Blotter.

Or Hollywood. They seem to like arrogant asses.

Thanks to HRLady!!

Spit-Shine

A waitress I once worked with was not very bright. If she saw spots on a glass in the dish room, she would spit on her finger and rub them off, then shine the glass on her sweaty work shirt. The worst part is that she saw nothing wrong with that practice until one day....

a customer complained about a spotty glass. She did her spit/shine routine right at their table and put the glass back down at the place setting. She didn't understand why the customer was so freaked out, and insisted it was no big deal because her "mother used to do that all the time at home". The manager got called over, and she was fired immediately.

Is it weird that this post make me a little sad? Just the fact that she didn't understand the problem kinda depresses me.

Or maybe it's just PMS.

Time for chocolate and a weepy Lifetime movie. Oooooooh, and potato chips. Okay, gotta go!

Your dishwasher at work apparently sucks, Sweetie99!

Build The Ark!

Okay, so last week, there was an illness in the family that prevented me from posting as much as I would like. Things are much better on that front BUT....living in the flooded Northeast, my basement is under a foot of water. So hang in there...

I WILL BE BACK!!!

Home Sweet Home

A friend of mine is an architect.  His personal style is classy, understated and elegant, but he has to pander to the desires of his clients, obviously.  In this day and age of gaudy McMansions, he is requested to do all sorts of insane things - one client even requested a huge gilded two seater swing hanging in their two story foyer.  Eventually, he became so exasperated he decided to go a little crazy with his plans and throw in the most bizarre features he could imagine just to see what would happen.  "Floating bathtub" mounted on clear pedestals - client loved it.  Toilet encased in a raised throne - client loved it.  Curved walls in a hallway to create the illusion of walking through a tube - you guessed it, they loved it.

He hates just about every job he has done, but he is in high demand and rolling in dough.

You know what? Curved walls would make cleaning so much easier.  No more dust (or in my home, dog hair - and lots of it) accumulating in the non-existent corners.

Though I would probably have some big problems when tipsy.

How can I get me one of them there toilet thrones, Sebastian?

Sandy's Bad Week

We all know some weirdness has been going on in the life of Sandra Bullock, but I'm not referring to what you think I am:

Fiber Optic Aliens

I was in a meeting the other day, presenting some stuff to a group of people.  One woman was FLOORED by what she called "the amazing technology".  Mind you, I was demonstrating some very basic stuff.  Since it appeared she was none too bright, I thought I'd play with her a little bit.  So I told her "Yeah, all this technology came from the aliens at Roswell, even fiber optics and all that".  Her eyes almost bugged out of her head as she bought my bull.  Then I suggested that the best road trip ever would be to get an RV and go to Roswell, to which she replied "I'd LOVE to do that, that is so going on my bucket list."

That was a fun meeting.

Road trip to a desert in New Mexico!  Yeah!! Wahoo!

That was sarcasm, by the way.

I don't know if that was exactly a nice thing to do, but it sure was an amusing one,  MyFavoriteGuy!